May 9, 2008                                   Valparaiso, IN

Yesterday I dug out a stump.  Over the winter a burning bush (taller than my reach) that was jammed between parallel walkway and driveway died.  (I would think it was 'cause my mom, walking past it a week or so ago, said she should take it out, but on observation, I realized that the burning bush next door is already quite leafy.  So I guess it wasn't the Power of Mom that made it kick the bucket!)

I have mixed feelings about its demise myself.  It was too big for the space available to it, and was a visual obstacle when I tried to back out of the garage.  But to see something that seemed perfectly healthy last year just fail to bud out this spring is sad.

Anyway, it was truly all-brown brittle dead.  I sawed off the branches, which I was pretty proud of.  The only trouble was, that left a stump.

Now, I think I'm pretty good at ignoring stumps.  The only trouble is, this property has too many stumps.  It is getting hard for me to see them as anything other than eyesores to be camouflaged with vines, which proceed to try to dress the whole property - lawns, shrubs and flowerbeds - in similar uniform!  We already have at least five kinds of vines, probably originally planted to cover up eyesores!

I decided that I wanted that stump OUT.

I told my mom I wasn't sure I could do it, but I was going to try.

So I literally dug in.

It took me over an hour, probably.  I got dirtier than I've been in years.  While I did it I cursed all the worthless males in my life who wouldn't dirty their hands doing such a chore - at least, not for me!  I fantasized what I would do if some new male approached me offering his services, (ha!  fat chance!  I'm sixty!) wondering how I would handle it if he hoped to receive "services" (or at least "attentions") in return.

I considered quitting and returning to the chore next day, but I didn't want to get this dirty again!

So I persisted.

That's all it took.  Oh, time, and energy, sure.  Maybe a few brains.  (Oh, and now I'll start putting my foot on that side of the hole so that if my cheap spade slips or breaks I won't smash my face against that knobbly woody passive deadly weapon!)

Persistence, that's all!

Those offers of aid we commonly receive from men are wonderful, but ultimately debilitating.  They weaken us by allowing us to fail to test our own abilities and limits.

All it took for me to get that stump out was persistence in the face of failure of offers to help.  Well, hell, I've experienced that kind of situation all my life.  Haven't we all? 

Give me a bigger stump, though, and I will probably hire a stump remover - whatever they are called!  Oh, yeah, now I remember! 

MEN!

May 8, 2008                                    Valparaiso, IN

As everyone who cares knows, Hillary Clinton barely won the Indiana Primary.  Now, since I voted for Obama, I need feel no guilt about the outcome.

It's a funny thing.  I don't know if you remember, but sometime soon after Clinton and Obama declared their candidacies, I said here on my website that of the two, Clinton is the underdog.  Black men got the vote (only 1/4 of a vote, but still a vote!) before women in this country.  Now a 1/2 or so black man might beat out a woman for a chance at the Presidency.  Not a black man!  A 1/2 black man!  White men, you still have a representative in Obama!  He may only be 1/2 white (I bet he's more than that!) but he's all man!

Let's face it.  In little isolated communities all over the world, there may not always have been minorities to oppress, but there were always women!  You could always count on being able to bully the weaker sex, even if there wasn't another race to try to exert your "superiority" over!

I just thought it would be funny if we had a 1/2 black man President before we get a woman, because it goes right along with what I said several months ago when I found out that black men got the vote before women.

I was telling my daughter about that, and she said, "That's what you always said when I was growing up, mom.  You always said that a black man would be elected President before a white woman."

What do you know!  Well, now maybe we'll see!

Hillary Clinton should have listened to me.  She should have made an "O, Hillary, O!" slogan.  But she still has hopes of obtaining the Democratic candidacy after all.

If she doesn't, maybe it will be time for a woman's "I have seen the Promised Land!" speech.  Only forty-five years after Martin Luther King's! 

May 7, 2008                                     Valparaiso, IN

It wasn't until I answered my mom's how-are-you-today question with the answer, "Sleepy, sluggish and slow," that I realized how slimey so many "sl" words are!

Slothful, sloughs and slurries and slush (they are all thick and heavy) slurping, slut, slump, slouch, slats (not in themselves, but sinister people peer through them!)  Slight (not slimy but certainly insignificant in one way or another!  Ditto slim although that can be a compliment when applied to a human!)  Slap - not pleasant! Slug - even less so - either kind of slug!)  Slip - okay as a wearable thing, I guess (although I virtually never wear them!), often dismissive (a mere slip of a girl) and as a verb something that we really can all do without!

Sleds are okay, though.  But slander isn't!  No, that is definitely slimey!  Slosh is something okay as long as we do it intentionally, and other people probably never like it when we do!  (I myself intentionally slosh about as often as I wear a slip!)

Slash - definitely violent association for any slashee!  Slit, likewise.  Slay - well.  Slave (that's where the name Slav came from, and it wasn't complimentary.)

Slattern - don't call your mother-in-law that and expect her to take it as high praise!  (In fact, it is so negative that it tempts me to take another look at the word "slat" for pejorative connotations!)

Slide has some good associations - but probably not as many as bad ones.  Slick also - even not about potentially falling situations, it kind of implies too much of what might otherwise be a good thing!

A sloop is some kind of floating boat - I don't know if it is a lesser sort of ship!  Have to plead to being a slacker when it comes to this word!

Slalom seems to have no negative connotations - unless it goes out of control and ends in disaster - not an unheard of event!

Slumber - but ah, that can lead to dreams!  There's the rub!

Slate is okay - except to lots of students!

That's all the "sl" words I can think of offhand.  You must admit it is an impressive list of negative words.  Let's slam the door on it!

May 6, 2008                                 Valparaiso, IN

Well, I voted today.  Lest people think I am completely parochial in my voting, I would also like to say I am also superstitious and ignorant!

I not only voted for the Presidential candidate, but also candidates I know little to nothing about.  Usually I don't do that, but what the hell, it is only a primary.  I didn't do it unless there was only one unopposed nominee that I kind of had a good feeling about, or I got to choose three out of four.  My vote isn't likely to break number 4, I figure!

Okay, I didn't do my homework.  If I don't do it next time I won't vote for the city councilpeople.  I promise!

But I wasn't totally parochial in voting for Obama.   It is not only that I am a writer who is using Clinton's book-publishing experience against her.  I am also not impressed AT ALL by the offer of not paying gas taxes.

If Americans are using so much gas that gasoline taxes have a major impact on their budgets, they should slow down a little, like the airplanes are.  I believe Obama when he says the gas companies will just raise the prices to compensate for their losses.  I believe him when he says they tried to do the same thing in Illinois and it didn't work.  I also believe the experts that agree with him.

The way to sock it to the gas companies is not to make them pay taxes.  It is to stop being so damn addicted to their products!  (Sure, l drive a car now (paid for by my elderly mom and (mostly) for her convenience!)  But I have the right to talk about life without car ownership.  I have done it (joyfully) for decades of my adulthood.

And I'm not even trying to talk anybody out of owning a car!  I'm only saying, that if you need to save money on gas, the amount you save by CUTTING BACK ON THE GALLONS OF GAS YOU USE will add up way faster than not paying the sales tax on what you do use.

And oh, spare me.  I've talked to lots of people and I have observed what they do.  They rarely even think about combining errands or walking or riding their bikes to perform any errand at all, even one a half mile away.

Americans are just addicted to speed, and they are, for the most part, leg-lazy.

Don't get mad at me for saying so!  Prove me wrong!

(Using less is a great way to save on food, too!  Eat less!  Waste less!  Oh, yeah, and that will help you save on medical bills!  I look at what people eat in restaurants and I am living proof that you could probably live on half that!  Think of the money you'd save!  Lots and lots of money!  (Or like me, spend it on traveling and the movies and...)

Oh, and the superstitious part of my bad, irresponsible vote today?  The potential councilman I didn't vote for was named John.  I read in a name book that men named John do whatever they want.  I was married to a guy named John, and it sure seemed true to me!  Also, do you think it is an accident that whores call their customers "Johns?"  I don't think so!

Ha, ha!  You can think I was just kidding in that last paragraph - if you want to!

May 5, 2008                                 Valparaiso, IN

Do you believe in ghosts?  I guess you better, because by all reports they are doing a lot of writing!

I did not realize what a big industry ghostwriting is.  At the same time I began to be aware of the magnitude of the practice (day before yesterday) I found out that ghostwriting is being outsourced to other countries!  You can get someone in - you guessed it - India! - to write something for you for a fraction of the amount you would pay in the U.S.

That kind of irritates me.  It seems to me that if you are well-known and famous enough to need a ghostwriter, maybe you are not so poor that you have to hire one on the cheap! 

In the Wikipedia article I read a statement about the proliferation of ghostwriting activity in Kolkata:

"Kolkata city has turned out to be a hub of ghostwriting organizations;  and the trend is growing.  More and more ghostwriting organizations are flocking in the city than ever before."

Ha, ha!  Now I know why I see so much odd English around!  I thought it was written by idiomatically illiterate Americans!  Now I realize it is written by very literate foreigners!  Ha, ha!

Well, from now on I won't call my language, spoken or written, "English!"

From now on, I talk and write "American!"

After all, years ago Henry Higgins "said" Americans hadn't spoken English for years!

Who am I to contradict him?  From now on I'm gonna talk American, and write it too!  Even to ghostwriters flocking in my city!

May 4, 2008                               Valparaiso, IN

News, news.  I was leaning toward voting for Clinton in Tuesday's primary, but I have changed my mind.

Why?  Ghostwriting, that's why.

I know famous people do it - have books written for them largely by someone else.  The "other" writer's name is often found on the cover of these books along with the name of the prominent person whose experiences or expertise form the basis of the text.

And upon doing some Internet research, I know that Clinton hired a ghostwriter to write It Takes a Village.  That fact seems to be undisputed.

Evidently there was some fuss about what kind of a job the ghostwriter did.  Her work didn't live up to expectations or something, so she receives no acknowledgment in the book - certainly none on the title page!

There is room for all three of Hillary Rodham Clinton's name there, however.

I looked up Obama.  Meant to read at least one of his books (cramming before the primary!) but all copies are checked out.  According to his publishers, he is really a good writer.

Now, I'm a writer.  (Unpaid, but one can always hope!)  I value the act and process of writing.  I appreciate that an editor must suggest changes and help make the work more readable and saleable.  All that.  But as a writer, I want people to know it is my work.

When I pick up someone else's book, I want to know it is that person's work.  Call me naive.  In the last twenty-four hours or so I have learned that in this respect, I really am!  But from what I read on the Internet (comments by his editors and publishers), in Obama's case he really is the author of his books.

The fact that Hillary hired a ghostwriter startled me a little.  Why would she need to?  She's well-educated and literate.  Okay, she's busy.

What bothers me more was (it would seem) the lack of a good resolution to the dispute, and the hard feelings that resulted from the whole episode.  If this possible future President could not publish a book without incurring enemies, how will she manage with foreign heads of state?

Oh, are you telling me she would treat them with more respect?

'Nuff said.

I'm voting for Obama.  What we need is a President who is really diplomatic and who is creative enough to find amicable (not just legal, but hopefully amicable) solutions to difficult situations.

(But I swear, if I have to see him on TV calling himself the underdog one more time, I won't be responsible for my actions!  (In the polling booth, I mean!))

May 3, 2008                                         Valparaiso, IN

Yesterday was bunny day.  In the morning I saw a little one right before he scurried under the front porch.  Looks like he's been dining on gourmet crocus leaves (fancy ones with a white stripe down the middle!)  So far they have been left pretty long so I have hopes the plants will survive.

He better finds another place to dodge to avoid me, though.  Pretty soon he'll be too big to fit through those decorative (and now that I realize it, raccoon and possum-excluding) lattice-holes!

On my way to and from the new movie theatre in town I saw a couple of giganto cottontails.  (Consequence of living in the shadow of fast food eateries?)

Walking home I was treated to the full force of sirens that seemed to scream interminably (for a tornado warning, I was told) and I saw one young bunny standing like a statue on his hind legs.  Do rabbits have the same response to weird loud unfamiliar noises that they do to headlights?

I managed to get home before the tornado didn't hit!

May 2, 2008                                  Valparaiso, IN

It seems that competition inspires many - to cheat!

The obvious cases we all think of are the people who illegally take steroids to beef up their performances or who take short-cuts in races.  We contemplate those who cheat on exams and have other people write their term papers.  (Or have books ghost-written by people whose names do not appear on the title page?  Is that cheating?  I think so!)

But what about people who set up a whole social community, based on supposed religious principles and teach children to accept as normal and moral practices that are illegal, unconstitutional and abusive?

How about that for eliminating and/or besting the competition?

Keeping people physically or psychologically captive to work for slave wages (or for nothing!  Out of "love!")  Now there is monumental cheating for you!

Can't take the idea of a woman in your life choosing one of your male competitors for a lover or a husband?  Lock her up!  Hide her!  Turn her into a slave in your home!  (Your home - it sure isn't a home for her!)  This is a situation prone to abuses in any culture.  In our culture the practice is despicable and inexcusable.

Too many young males hanging around offering competition for you older males who already have wives and offspring?  Kick them out!  Exile them (after bringing them up in a way that will decidedly reduce their fitness for contemporary society outside of your enclave!) All so you can possess (literally!) more women!  Rape and "marry" their potential teen-age girlfriends!

And then act all moral and noble!  You make me puke!  I hope Jay Leno and his writers brainstorm some ripping good jokes to put you bastards in your places, because I sure can't think of anything funny about it!

Well, this is my last rant about competition for now.  I have come full circle back to the chilling treatment of women that originally inspired it.

Sure, everything in nature has to compete to some extent in some way or other to have a good life.  But the way some humans do it, well, it's enough to turn you to religion...

(Oh right, wait, often it is religious men (and organizations run by them) that are perpetrating the crappy treatment and squash-downs of women!)

It's enough to turn you to Goddess!

May 1, 2008                                 Valparaiso, IN

So, competition... what does the word evoke in you?  Does it fire you up, make you ambitious?  Or does it make you feel weak and inadequate and discouraged?

What do you think of when you hear the word?  Do you think of athletic prowress?  Do you think of moral ascendancy?

Does the existence of a contest make you at least toy with the idea of entering, even if you know you don't stand much chance of actually winning?

What are society's motives for introducing competitions?  More people trying their hands at more different things looks like a good thing to me!  (Except maybe eating competitions!  Disgusting!  But then, who has the right to decide some competitions are unworth of our efforts?  (Obviously, not me!))

A competition puts you in touch with like-minded individuals.  It increases the number of social interactions.

We tend to think of competition and cooperation as opposing things.  But are they?  Can you really have one without the other?

P.S.  Happy Flower Day!  Should we have a competition - who saw the largest variety of blossoms today?

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